The Facts of Life - Pumpkinman Recap

How does the theme song go?

"You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have The Facts of Life, the Facts of Life."

Well, it seems my newness to the sport of triathlon is manifesting itself in some serious inconsistencies. Sharon's Back was miserable; Timberman was a joy. Pumpkiman, unfortunately, turned into a mechanical nightmare, one that could've been easily remedied with an Allen wrench. But I'm getting ahead of myself....

3:30 am - Wake up call. Getting up that early isn't nearly as bad as you think and since I didn't have any of the cold symptoms I'd been suffering from in days prior, I was quite happy Saturday morning, er night, er morning. All of my stuff was packed and ready to go, so I just brushed my teeth, put on my club uniform (and three warm layers - it was 50 degrees), made my coffee and left.

4:30 am - I met Julie, another TriFury club member, at a nearby shopping mall so we could do the early morning drive together. I begged Julie to stop for coffee because apparently in my half sleep state, I managed to brew the worst pot imaginable. Thank goodness for 24-hour McDonalds.

6:00 am - We arrived in South Berwick, ME, registered and set up transition. It was overcast and quite cold so I was a bit concerned about what to wear on the bike, but I soon figured it out. And then it was 7:30 and time for the pre-race meeting and warm-up.

8:00 am - And they're off...sort of. The Elites couldn't hear the race announcer and just stood there as he yelled, "Go, go, go." A little confusion and a few seconds later and they ran into the water. I was in Wave 5, which started ten minutes later so I just watched the Elites swim the course. I noticed that the women in the Wave in front of me seemed reluctant to put their heads in the water and was surprised by that, until it was my turn.

I was hoping for a good swim and according to my time, achieved it, but it was difficult. The air was cold and the water felt cold; I struggled to breathe throughout the race. I just felt like I couldn't get a full breath, despite emptying my lungs fully AND breathing every other stroke. In any case, I made it out of the water in 9:54...and if there is true parity, it's a tremendous improvement over Timberman, which was also a 600 meter course (12:12).
Swim time: 9:54

8:20 am - The Great Hill Climb Challenge or a 250 meter transition ascent that apparently didn't count toward your total time (which I didn't know until afterward). Seriously, I couldn't figure out why people were walking up the hill; I booked up that hill thinking, look at all the people I"m passing! Chalk it up to another newbie mistake. But I came in first in my AG. ;-)
Hill Climb time: 1:20


8:25 am - After a longer than necessary transition (think: trying to catch breath after Hill Challenge), I hopped on my bike and flew on the course. I was thrilled; I seemed to be going faster than usual and although I was getting passed by the serious bikers, I was doing some passing myself.

Until mile 6.5. At that point, I felt my seat start to wiggle beneath me and knew I needed to pull over and check it out. Loose...and not just a little loose, but more like a very loose tooth that's just dangling by a thread and one slight movement would send it shooting out of your mouth...*that* kind of loose. An aid car stopped and asked me if I needed anything and when I asked for an Allen wrench, she said, um sorry.

At that point, I had a couple of choices: 1) Continue to ride and pray that I made it or 2) Yell down the line and hope someone would take pity on me and throw me an Allen wrench. I chose #1. I should add that while I was contemplating my options, a man came up behind me walking his bike. Apparently, he had a flat and didn't have anything to change it with. I offered up my flat kit and tube, which he gladly took. I then gingerly got back on my bike and continued the ride.

Until mile 12. Oh, that dreadfully steep hill at mile 12. You know, the one that forced my seat to GO FLYING OFF THE BACK OF MY BIKE? So, yes, I stopped, picked up the pieces and once again, considered my options. Do I run/walk the bike in? Do I try to ride it? Or do I DNF? I was losing serious time so I put the loose bolts in my seat bag, popped the seat sideways on the seat post and ran the bike up the hill. And then I did the craziest thing I've ever done - I rode 2.5 miles back to the transition area STANDING UP praying I didn't fall on the post.
Bike time: 59:27 (14.1 mph)


9:25 am- Do you even want to hear about the run? Because it was uneventful. I struggled with one hill and had to take a hit of the inhaler, but still managed a good run time. It was fairly flat at the start and hilly on the backside, but the final 100 meters were completely downhill, which was a pleasure.
Run time: 26:49 (just under 9 min miles)



Total Time - 1:41:14 (1/3 mile swim/14.25 mile bike/3 mile run)

I hate to think what I could've done had I not been saddled (literally) with mechanical problems. And yes, I am disappointed...but also thrilled that I didn't give up and that I finished.

So take that, Pumpkinman!