Why is it?

... the one time you *really* need your camera, the batteries on the damn device run out? Annoying.

Posting and Crocs

Part I:

I have had *no* desire to post recently. Perhaps it's the new baby, but I'm not entirely sure. I've had the desire to do thousands of other mundane tasks--set-up Raya's bank account, start her 529, do laundry and dishes (and you know how much I hate to do chores)--yet, I haven't been able to bring myself to write. I'll be honest: I haven't much to say and I fear my writing is no longer any good thanks to having far fewer brain cells than before I had the baby.

Anyhoo, I'll do my best, but I can't promise anything.

___

On another note, I am once again obsessed with Crocs; so much so that I purchased a pair of moc-Crocs for the wee one. Really? Don't believe me? Take a look at this photo of the three ladies in their rubbery shoes...

And this one of the baby and her chunky monkey thighs...

Dancing Queen, Part 2

Yes, you will need to turn your head, but I promise it will be worth it!

Dancing Queen

A short video from Petra's first recital

I love Shirley MacLaine

I really do. She's an amazing actress and I love every piece of work I've seen her in, including the not-so-fantastic-except-for-Shirley film, In Her Shoes, the movie about two sisters--played by Cameron Diaz and Toni Collette-- who have some SERIOUS ISSUES.

So the film...let me tell you, the scenes in the adult living community have endeared me to the movie completely. My grandmother lived in the exact sort of place for many, many years; I remember visiting Century Village in Deerfield Beach on almost every school holiday...I feel like my sister and I were there constantly.

Anyhoo, I fell in love with Shirley MacLaine all over again as I watched this movie. I so wished she were my grandmother...not because I didn't love my two, but because I would love to be related to her...to hang out with her...to play gin runny with her. Wouldn't that be a hoot?

Do you think she'd adopt me?

don"t try this at home

the one-handed post, ladies and gentlemen. pretty impressive, huh? i have a sleeping infant in the crook of my left arm so i'm limited...but still able to type.

as an update, raya continues to amaze as the best eater in the world! we go back to the doctor on monday so we'll see just how much weight she's gained.
______
Petra has a dance recital on the 20th and I promise to take video. I cannot promise however that she'll actually dance...only that she'll be dressed and ready to do so. Remember, I've been to her school recitals before and it's apparent that my child suffers from stage fright in a fierce way.
_____
Hey, anyone seen SJP's line of clothes, Bitten? Supposedly the line launches at Steve and Barry's (or something like that) later this week. The stuff looks cute (saw it on Oprah) and every piece in the line is $20 or less. Um....how in the hell do you produce cute clothes that cheap? Is the quality crap? Or has she just figured out that she really doesn't need any more money and is sacrificing profit margin just so we can all outfit ourselves like Carrie Bradshaw? Anyone? Anyone? If you buy a piece or two, let me know what you think. I'm always interested in the cute and the cheap.

Raya Laine

Raya's first home video!

Today's Intake...feel free to ignore

I won't do this for very long, but I do need to keep track in the short-term to see how much food this child is actually consuming. So as I said, feel free to ignore this and any other baby-feeding related posts...but the blog is a very easy place to record the info.

8:30am 4oz
11:30am 4oz
2:45pm 4oz
(PLEASE HOLD FOR MORE DATA)
5:45pm 4oz
8:45pm 4oz
1:50am 4oz
4:50am 4oz + a poop!

Grand total: 28oz in 24 hours...right on track!

Raya Bear

So far, so good. She seems to be a good baby (knock wood): She eats, sleeps and poops...and that's about it. She cries only when she needs something and makes lots of great squeaky sounds.

Did I mention she poops a lot? Yesterday we had an international poop incident, one that forced both of us to change our clothes and take tubbies. Yep. She pooped through her diaper, through her onesie and through my shirt.

And did I mention she likes to eat? According to the doctor, she's taking in waaay too much food. Um. Ooops! So I'm going to keep track (thanks blog!) for a few days just to see exactly how much she's actually eating in a 24-hour period.

Wednesday, May 30
6:30am 4oz
10:45am 5oz
1:00pm 2oz
5:20pm 4oz
9:30pm 4.5oz
(PLEASE HOLD)
12:50am 4oz
4:15am 4oz
For a grand total of 27.5 ounces

I promise...

...if I ever get tuberculosis, I will not jeopardize the health of hundreds of people by BOARDING A PLANE TWICE and flying across the pond just so I could get married and honeymoon in Greece. Promise. Won't happen.

Why this person knowingly did it is beyond me...especially because he apparently suffers from an extremely drug-resistant form of the disease.

I think this qualifies him for the Guinness Book of World Records for greatest jackass move of all time. Do you agree?

Check out the story on CNN if you haven't already.

Getting back into shape

So I'm well on my way. According to my scale (which is very good to me, I might add), I've lost 26 pregnancy pounds, which means I only have 11 pounds to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight and 15-17 lbs to be where I want to be.

The only problem is that despite the weight loss, I am still quite misshapen and I'm sure I've lost quite a bit of muscle mass (from lack of both weight training and protein).

So I've changed my diet (mostly), started walking on a daily basis, and will resume some weight activity this weekend.

Oh, and I *will* buy my first pair of Spanx. 'Cause let's face it, nothing will be the same again after birthing two babies. So the perfect bod (or at least a tighter one) must be faked.

Eat much?

I think you will all agree that my baby likes to eat... A LOT.

Tee hee!

Okay, I'm NOT 14...

...but apparently my skin thinks I am. My forehead and cheeks are breaking out. With acne! What's up with that?

Yes, I understand that my hormones are going bonkers right now, but there's no need for them to screw with my face. They're doing a good enough number on me mentally; I really don't need the added stress of ZITS. Ick. I really hope it won't get TOO bad because if it does, you'll see me on a Proactive commercial soon enough.

And just think, pretty soon my hair will start to fall out, my boobs will shrivel up and die and I'll be stuck with an extra 4-10 pounds (all in the wrong places, I might add)! Won't that be lovely? Don't. Answer.

The Dancing Finale

I zoomed through it today (thanks DVR) because let's be honest, it was the most bloated finale special save perhaps that of the Bachelor. I skipped through most of it - saw the dances (which were all really, really good), caught the scores and saw the crowning.

So the obvious question: Am I disappointed that the FAT ONE didn't win? Not really. Apolo performed very well...especially in the finale...and deserved the win. And even though he was disappointed, Joey was very gracious. Laila? Not so much...you could tell she was pissed. Somehow I don't think she's used to placing third nor do I think she was really expecting to do so.

All in all, this was the best Dancing with the Stars yet. It was the most entertaining and had the best talent. Good job, ABC!

8lbs 8oz

Apparently Raya likes her food...and her food likes her back: She gained an entire POUND in one week. Babies are supposed to get back up to their birth weight one to two weeks after birth....Raya did that and more (to the tune of 13oz!)

So here's a picture from today just so you can see those incredibly yummy chubby cheeks.

And in case you think I'd forgotten about the older child, here is one of her recent school pics. She looks too damn old, if you ask me. Where did my toddler go? But isn't she incredibly sweet looking? It's very deceptive... ;-)

My money's on Joey

Tonight is the Dancing finale -yes, I'm actually quite sad - and I fully expect Joey, the FAT ONE to win. Last night, he proved with his freestyle that he is an exceptional entertainer and a great dancer.

My second choice is the CUTE ONE, Apolo. He doesn't have the entertainment factor, but he is a strong dancer and looks great with his partner.

I've never been a huge Laila fan so I won't be disappointed if she comes in third. I don't, however, expect her to win.

We'll see. I think this will prove to be the closest race yet.

Every 240 minutes, I push the button.

Because if I forget to push that button every 240 minutes, a catastrophe of biblical proportions awaits. I'm not sure the wails of an 11-day old child could cause a plane to drop from the sky, but they certainly make me wish I were on some deserted island stuck only with Matthew Fox and the smoke monster.

And so every day I set my watch to countdown the critical 240 minutes until my newborn's next feeding. As I type, I have 25 minutes to go...

Petsmart Commercial (Barky Von Schnauzer)

Just in case you haven't seen it.

Dear Raya,

Can I just tell you that you make the cutest squeaking noises I've ever heard? I've taken to calling you Squeaky McCracken...don't ask me why. In the hospital I called you Squeaky Von Schnauzer because I call your sister Barky Von Schnauzer when she has the croupy cough. I know it sounds strange, but there is a funny PetSmart commercial in which a guy calls for his dog - Barky Von Schnauzer. It cracks me up every time I see it.

Anyhoo, you're sleeping right now - something you do well and often. But I have to remind you of two events in particular, both of which happened today:

1. You projectile pooped all over your father as he changed your diaper. Apparently it was pretty damn nasty and required him to take a shower tout de suite!
2. You spit up an entire bottle of formula....DOWN MY SHIRT. Not on my shirt. DOWN MY SHIRT. It was rather nasty, but really funny at the same time. Don't worry, I'll remind you of this particular incident when you're 15 and want nothing to do with me. And I'll do it in front of all of your friends.

I've decided not to keep a baby book; this seems to be a much better way to chronicle the trials and tribulations of motherhood (and babyhood!)

Oh, and thanks for the one-eyed smiles. They make my day.

I really did it!

I birthed that child and she is gorgeous. I've told this story a million times and I don't have much energy to write it all down, so bear with me. I'll share in installments. And I promise to start blogging again; as you can imagine, I've been quite busy these past few days!

So, here's the TWOP summary:

• Was supposed to be induced Friday morning, May 11.
• Got bumped. EVERYONE apparently decided to deliver that day (figures).
• Took a shower. Thought my water broke and started to really contract.
• Called doctor. They said, come on in. I told them I'd wait because they were busy. They said I couldn't.
• Natche had to take a shower and do about 50 other things. I drove myself to the hospital so he could finish and then take P to school.
• Got there (around 9, I think) and got checked. Water hadn't broken BUT I was 6cm dilated and contractions (not strong) were 2-3 minutes apart.
• They decided to keep me in the room even though they were incredibly busy and weren't prepared to deliver me yet. I told them I'd go down to the cafe if it would help. They said no; they weren't prepared for me to deliver in a hospital hallway.
• Asked for epidural. Nurse told me they needed to get a bag of fluids in me first...so they started my IV. Or tried to. Didn't like the nurse who blew my vein the first time.
• Natche finally arrived and I continued to lie in bed just waiting.
• Epi man came around 12-ish...I think. Didn't like him either. It took more than 30 minutes and SEVERAL tries to get the damn catheter in my back and that hurt worse than anything else I endured that day. Thankfully the final try took and ended up being a good epidural.
• Nancy, my wonderful midwife, broke my water sometime between 1 and 2....as Natche was eating his lunch. Tee hee!
• Nurse Elaine catheterized me to empty my bladder around 3-ish. Did you know that a full bladder can impede labor?
• Began to push at 5 min to 4pm.
• Raya was born 25 minutes later at 4:20pm, Friday May 11, 2007.

The best parts: No pain. No tearing. No swelling. No bleeding. And, most importantly, I got to watch my daughter being born. It was fantastic.

I'll post more later. But for now, here are/were her stats:

Raya Laine, 7lbs 11oz, 20" long